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Procopio’s Got Talent – Chapter 7 – Philippines’ Got Talent

“Shot to the heart

And you’re to blame,

You give love…

A bad name!”

Jon Bon Jovi’s heart-pumping song packs Procopio’s room as he oddly dances in the showers while holding a shampoo bottle like a microphone. He mimics the wild gestures of a rock star on stage but fails miserably. He slips and almost hits his face hard on the white tiled wall.

“Why don’t you join Philippines’ Got Talent?”

“You should totally join Philippines’ Got Talent!”

“Yeah! Join PGT!”

“PGT! PGT! PGT!”

The three letter shortcut of a well-known local television talent search show echoes inside Procopio’s head as the lukewarm water from the showerhead tenderly drizzles on the top of his head.

After their group’s remarkable performance at the office’s Christmas party, the crowd has only one thing to say. All their coworkers want to see Procopio’s group on TV.

Procopio dismisses the idea of the group joining such a nationwide contest. He is quite a reserved person and does not fancy popularity. He deems the idea as absurd and unrealistic.

After putting his boxers on, Procopio fixes a bowl of milk and cereals. As he lay the box of cereals down on his kitchen table, he notices a half-page advertisement of Philippines’ Got Talent on the broadsheet. He gives a big smirk, immediately sits on his grubby couch and turns the TV on. With his eyes widely opened, he puts on an overflowing spoonful of cereals in his mouth.

“Philippines’ Got Talent is now holding auditions at the following venues!”

The loud announcement flashes on the TV screen and greets him with a bang.

Procopio instantly throws the entire cereals in his mouth back into his bowl. He hurriedly snatches the remote and changes the channel. He finds a funny kiddie cartoon show and settles down with it. He stares at the TV, without even blinking, like a small boy. And after a few laughs, he proceeds to eat his bowl of grimy cereals.

“Yuuuck!” says Tin deafeningly.

She has been chatting online with Sands for about two hours now while lying on her belly on top of her pink bed. The two girls have been ecstatically chattering about their fantastic performance last week. Over the last several minutes, they have been disputing about what song to present should they join the PGT auditions two weeks from now. Tin types another song in response to Sands earlier suggestion.

i dont wanna miss a thing

The song title flashes on Sands 18-inch computer screen right away.

Sands’ long, slender, smooth and slightly tanned legs shine as she puts a deep red nail polish on her right toe nail. She is sitting on a wooden chair, with her right foot raised on it, revealing black laced panties below a presumably braless white college shirt. She notices the message on her computer screen and thinks hardly of a new song. She types using only her left hand and presses the Enter key.

brng m 2 lyf

Upon seeing Sands’ new song on the screen, Tin searches for another song on her laptop’s music library. She finds a popular song and sends it to Sands right away.

Sands quickly glances on Tin’s message and naively replies,

k

XXXXX

After pretending to do some amount of work during the entire day, Procopio finally feels tired browsing his friends’ wall on Facebook. He senses a slight rumbling in his stomach and decides to quietly sneak into Tin’s cubicle. He sees a small pile of chocolate crinkles lying on Tin’s desk. Luckily, Tin has her headphones on so Procopio thinks it’s worth stealing some grub. Procopio walks carefully towards the crinkles and manages to get a piece. He immediately puts it inside his mouth and goes again for another piece.

“Hey!” shouts Tin.

Procopio is caught dumbfounded and with a crinkle in his mouth, the abrupt surprise renders him speechless.

“What do you think of this song?” asks Tin as she removes her headphones and puts them onto Procopio’s head.

Procopio savors the sweetness of the crinkle in his mouth while looking steadily at the pile of crinkles on the table. He finds it hard to pay attention to the song playing on his ears with such sweet delicacies a few feet in front of him.

“Nice,” says Procopio after finally swallowing the gooey mixture of chocolate and saliva in his mouth. He returns the headphones to Tin and goes to grab two pieces of crinkles.

Tin thinks that Procopio is referring to the song but Procopio is really complementing the chocolate crinkles.

“So this is gonna be our audition song then,” happily says Tin.

“Audition your ass,” says Procopio as he leaves Tin to search for something to drink.

XXXXX

That night, Procopio is having a hard time sleeping again. He searches within him the possible reason for his restlessness. He thinks hard for something he might have forgotten to do during the day. He concentrates as hard as he can. His face is progressively turning red. A few drops of sweat are already slowly forming on his forehead. Suddenly, he remembers the chocolate crinkles he ate in the afternoon. It quickly puts a smile on his face.

“Audition your ass.”

Procopio recollects the last words he said to Tin that day. He then remembers the look upon Tin’s face after hearing those words. A feeling of guilt hits Procopio from the inside. He realizes it was his first time ever seeing joy leaving Tin’s face. Her usually jubilant eyes, plump cheeks and blissful lips are now covered with dreadful anxiety and disappointment. Procopio normally sees that kind of look only during funerals but never upon Tin’s chubby face. He decides to apologize to Tin the next day.

XXXXX

Early the next morning, Tin enters her cubicle and sees a bar of chocolate lying on her keyboard. It gradually puts a smile on her face not because of the bar of chocolate but because of the message written on the Post-It note placed on top of it.

“Perfect AUDITION song. – Choco ”


Kuya Kowt’s Love Quotes

You know I like you.

I even care for you.

Sometimes I even think you’re more than just a friend knowing na iba na ang nararamdaman ko para sa’yo.

What if mahalin kita?

‘Wag na lang siguro.

‘Di yata masayang magmahal nang mag-isa.

Sana mahalin mo rin ako.” 

– Anonymous


Procopio’s Got Talent – Chapter 6 – Christmas in Our Hearts

CHRISTMAS IN OUR HEARTS

The large glimmering gold letters adorn the red wall behind the slightly elevated stage in the office floor’s lobby. The entire place is filled with laughter, non-stop chatting and the opulent smell of a sumptuous Christmas feast.

At the side of the stage, a short guy wearing a silly red scarf on top of a casual suit is busy talking to a fat girl wearing an over-the-top shiny red and gold dress. Each of them is holding a set of cue cards which tells us that they are most likely the host of this event.

Not far from the two is a group of girls busily exchanging jeers and teases paired with occasional bursts of deafening laughs. It is surprising to see these typical office girls scantily clad on a regular Friday afternoon.

In one corner of the lobby near the girls, a group of guys with wide taunting smile across their faces are pretty much occupied whispering indecent things to each other. They would swiftly glance at the girls and then whisper nasty things afterwards. The scantily clad girls have no clue that they are the subject of this covetousness.

There are about two hundred people in the lobby but one of them stands out the most. In the middle of the group of supervisors, Procopio’s heavily drunk lady supervisor is doing different stupid things on herself. She would repeatedly drink one shot of tequila, then suddenly fake a fall and then eventually land on the lap of her long time crush, a heavily-built male supervisor – who is already married by the way. The other supervisors find it funny and would constantly cheer them to kiss.

At the buffet table, Procopio is currently engaged in cold cuts and cheeses gastronomic escapade when Tin unexpectedly approaches him;

“Do I look fat?” asks Tin while displaying her green and maroon Christmas-inspired dress.

“Huffppt!” Procopio almost throws the entire mouthful of sausages in his mouth as he barely contains himself bursting into wild frenzy over Tin’s question.

“That’s fine girl but this one’s hot!” says Sands who abruptly appears behind Tin clothed in a very tight scorching red hot jumper.

Procopio swallows everything in his mouth at the sight of the alluring Sands and then leaves his drooling mouth open.

“Aren’t we supposed to be at the backstage right now?” asks Borg who has just arrived at the scene.

“Yeah, we should,” answers Tin with twinkling eyes and a huge smile on her face seeing Borg.

Sands and Tin nonetheless stay at the buffet table throwing themselves at Borg while Procopio keeps on munching the cold cuts and cheeses.

“Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen!” exclaims the male host prompting the opening of the afternoon program.

The four continues what they have been doing unmindful of the program.

A few moments after, the office manager gives his welcome remarks.

“Good… year… thanks… Christmas… to us…” are the only words that the four hears as they do not pay attention to what is happening.

After the office manager delivers his speech, the hosts introduce the dance group which proceeds to exhibit a very boring evolution of dance routine. This prompts the four to go at the backstage and prepare for their feat. Procopio, Borg, Tin and Sands narrowly escape a harrowing experience of witnessing a horrible dance catastrophe.

At last, the hosts introduce Procopio’s group. All the girls scream frantically upon seeing the princely Borg carrying an acoustic guitar. In contrast, the boys shut their mouths up upon seeing the erotic Sands. As if nobody notices Procopio and Tin as they take their positions on the slightly elevated stage. The four sets up in a fairly straight row with the two boys taking the outmost sides and the two girls standing in the middle. Procopio sits on his beat box on the left side while Borg sits on the right with his acoustic guitar. Tin and Sands contemplate as they prepare to sing.

Now the whole audience is holding their cell phones up recording the group’s entire performance.

Borg starts the song by gently plucking his guitar.

“Chestnuts roasting on an open fire…”

Sands starts to sing in her melodramatic voice.

“Jack Frost nipping at your nose…”

The crowd feels the depth of Sands’ emotion.

“Yuletide carols being sung by a choir…”

Sands gently hits the high note.

“And folks dressed up like Eskimos…”

The crowd gets hooked up.

“Everybody knows a turkey and some mistletoe…”

Tin starts to sing her part like a professional singer.

“Will help to make the season bright…”

The crowd gets amazed at Tin’s outstanding voice.

“Tiny tots with their eyes all aglow…”

Tin hits the high note with ease.

“Will find it hard to sleep tonight…”

The crowd is slowly inching towards the stage.

“Do they know that Santa’s on his way?”

Tin and Sands blend together while Procopio starts to give beats to the song.

“He’s loaded lots of toys and goodies on his sleigh…”

The crowd is having goose bumps hearing the four’s musical excellence.

“And every mother’s child is gonna spy…”

The four collaborates on the song impressively.

“To see if reindeers really know how to fly…”

The crowd is amazed as the two girls hit the high note perfectly.

“And so I’m offering a simple phrase…”

Tin and Sands throw a look at each other recognizing the crowd’s appreciation.

“To kids from one to ninety-two…”

The crowd is left speechless in awe.

“Though it’s been said many times, many ways…”

Procopio and Borg stops playing the beats and rhythm on cue.

“Merry Christmas to you…”

Tin and Sands deliver a great finale to the crowd’s delight.

The crowd could not contain themselves anymore and throws a loud clapping and cheering.

Amidst the raucous clamor, Procopio’s group proceeds to the song’s chorus again.

“Do they know that Santa’s on his way?
He’s loaded lots of toys and goodies on his sleigh.
And every mother’s child is gonna spy
To see if reindeers really know how to fly.”

Some of the crowd is starting to sing together with the group but they would softly stop upon reaching the high notes.

“And so I’m offering a simple phrase
To kids from one to ninety-two.
Though it’s been said many times, many ways,
Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas

To you.”

Procopio, Borg, Tin and Sands end the song and the crowd goes wild.


The Gamer and the Frog

An online gamer was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said,

“If you kiss me, I’ll turn into a beautiful princess.

He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket.

The frog spoke up again and said,

“If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one
week.”

The online gamer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket.

The frog then cried out,

“If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I’ll stay with you and do ANYTHING you want.”

Again the online gamer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket.

Finally, the frog asked,

“What is the matter? I’ve told you I’m a beautiful princess, that I’ll stay with you for a week and
do anything you want. Why won’t you kiss me?”

The online gamer said,

“Look I’m a gamer. I don’t have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog, now that’s cool.”

🙂


Fact U

Did you know?

That in circa 1450 BC,

By law and by custom, Mesopotamian women are controlled first by their fathers, then by their husbands and fathers-in-law, and finally by their sons.

 

From Encyclopedia Britannica Student and Home Edition